STAY DRY FAMILY SUPPORT GROUP FOR KIDS & ADULTS
Stay Dry Family Support GroupLinked Text
for kids & Adults
I have been running family incontinent support groups for over 20 years with the present one was started August 2005. Now what I discovered that the bedwetting issue in itself is not as important as how we and others react to it!
There is truly are a lot of misunderstanding on the bedwetting issue, which results in a lot of misconceptions from adults and kids.
Bedwetting issues are not as important as how it can affect a child, which can last a lifetime! Kid's self-esteem, self-image, self-worth, and confidence are affected by the bedwetting issues, because this is an uncontrollable event in their lives, and they know that toddler's master day and night control, and they have not. This just leaves them feeling no better than a baby.
Incontinence is such a very hard thing for adult and kids to deal with. Parents razing an incontinent child find they are high maintenance in regard to physical and emotional care. Kids that are 24/7 ( In diapers twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week) far more affected by it for having both Nocturnal Enuresis (Bedwetting) and Diurnal (Daytime time wetting) issues due to the fact they need to wear full time protection, which quite often means diapers.
Kids that are 24/7 feel bad enough to have to wear diapers. However, what exasperated there feeling even further is that the majority of them cannot manage them correctly; this result in them being fully dependent on their parents for help.
Many children have the misconception that they are a baby because of this issue. This is simply the wrong impression for them to have, because it is not what you wear that makes you who you are. However, children often don't realize this and are not taught that wearing a diaper is just another form of underwear; which is any clothing under you clothes thus the name underwear, and it just absorbent underwear.
Adults are able to come in terms with their incontinence where most kids do not. The reason kids don’t is the simple fact; they are closer to an age of toddler than an adult. Children just feel bedwetting issue reflects on them more as being a little kid/baby than an adult.
Kids who are bedwetters are quite often shamed by adults to motivate them to stop or teased by family members and friends, which make things just worse due to the fact these additional stress causes even more accidents due to the fact of an immature nervous system. So they end up having the opposite effect, which leaves them with a poorer self-esteem and confidence in themselves.
Once again, incontinence is not the important issue but how it affects a child, which can last a life time!!
Sincerely, Steven F. Trimarco
SOME POSTING IN OUR STAYDRY GROUP
Some posting in our StayDry group
Please note I have changed the names to protect member's privacy.
Topic Bedwetting issue with sleep overs (Please note mother and daughter (9yr) already had their first successful sleepover at their home)
With the success of our last sleepover, we're now thinking about the next step - letting Mary go over to a friend's house to spend the night. That seems like a much trickier problem, but it's something we'd like her to be able to do (she'd like it too).
Steve suggested that we could do pretty much the same thing we did at our house, except have the friend's mom help adjust the diaper after she pulled it up - we'd pre-tape a few diapers to send with her, then she could put it on with her PJs in private (in the bathroom, say), and then we'd figure out a way for her to go to the friend's mother to get help adjusting it. The mom could also wake her up early the next morning so she can take it off. I told Mary that idea, and she wasn't too thrilled with the idea of someone else knowing, even though I assured her only the mother, and not her friend, had to know, and would keep everything discrete. She knows that's an option, however, so maybe she'll change her mind and decide it's ok.
I'd probably tell the friend's parents anyway, so they're prepared (or at least not surprised) in case of a leak or something like that, even if Mary doesn't know that the parents know. But I don't think she'd be too happy about a solution that requires help from the other parents.
Maybe it's not a big deal - if she's still wetting the bed in a couple years she'll probably be better able to manage her protection on her own then, and could go to sleepovers then. Still, it's something that would be fun for her now.
Topic Bedwetting issue with 14yr old son issues coming to terms and acceptance to wearing protection to bed.
You might remember me talking about my bedwetting teenage son a while ago,
refusing to keep his diaper on at night. His bedwetting started to get out of
hand and he would refuse to wear a diaper because he thought it made him a baby
which ended up with a very wet bed nearly every day. I tried grounding,
spanking, everything and nothing seemed to work. Recently hes been coming down
from his room before dinner asking if i will put his diaper on for him and he
keeps it on until the morning. Not sure if he suddenly got tired of waking up in
a wet bed or is tired of me being angry at him all the time or what. Im just
glad hes being grown up about the whole thing after months of fighting. I have a
16 year old nephew who has always been really cooperative about getting his
protection on every night.
The following was taken out of our kid's questionnaire. I changed all the names on question 5 to protect kid's privacy.
5) Have your parents or family member ever got mad at you because of this problem and you got punish for it ? If yes please explain.
answer here >>
John, 13 No
Greg age 13 no
Lee 13 before my mom took me to the doctor. she use to get mad.she would tell every one i wet and wear a diapr.but not know.
Anna 13 yes i got spanked in the beginning cause my parents got tired of changing my wet sheets all the time
bob 13 No
Nancy 13g before, particularly for daytime accidents, they were
mad and punish me
Mike 13 NO!
Charlene 13 In the beginning, my mom thought I was doing it on purpose, but she understands now
Lindy 14 /Lisa 14 Not really.. At first dad thought we were being lazy cause we wet the bed, but he knows we weren't now.
Susan 14g Yes but that was because I wouldnt wear a diaper and had an accident.
Linda, 14 No
Mary 15 yes dad has lost his temper with me many times
Ted Jr B16 I-D/N Markl B11 I-D/N Tom B9 I-D/N No
James 15 mom punishes me if i dont change soon enough and leak on anything
Karen G 16 No
Michael W. 16 No, my folks or family members never got mad at me b/c of this problem
John S, 18 No
Edward 18 oh yes, when all this began, my parent believed that i was looking for more attention or something like that, so my dad used to punishme all the time, was a bad time, then mom take me to the doc and they realised that i was sick, and that was just the begining.