STAY DRY FAMILY SUPPORT GROUP FOR KIDS & ADULTS
Stay Dry Family Support GroupLinked Text
for kids & Adults
I have been running family incontinent support groups for over 20 years with the present one was started August 2005. Now what I discovered that the bedwetting issue in itself is not as important as how we and others react to it!
There is truly are a lot of misunderstanding on the bedwetting issue, which results in a lot of misconceptions from adults and kids.
Bedwetting issues are not as important as how it can affect a child, which can last a lifetime! Kid's self-esteem, self-image, self-worth, and confidence are affected by the bedwetting issues, because this is an uncontrollable event in their lives, and they know that toddler's master day and night control, and they have not. This just leaves them feeling no better than a baby.
Incontinence is such a very hard thing for adult and kids to deal with. Parents razing an incontinent child find they are high maintenance in regard to physical and emotional care. Kids that are 24/7 ( In diapers twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week) far more affected by it for having both Nocturnal Enuresis (Bedwetting) and Diurnal (Daytime time wetting) issues due to the fact they need to wear full time protection, which quite often means diapers.
Kids that are 24/7 feel bad enough to have to wear diapers. However, what exasperated there feeling even further is that the majority of them cannot manage them correctly; this result in them being fully dependent on their parents for help.
Many children have the misconception that they are a baby because of this issue. This is simply the wrong impression for them to have, because it is not what you wear that makes you who you are. However, children often don't realize this and are not taught that wearing a diaper is just another form of underwear; which is any clothing under you clothes thus the name underwear, and it just absorbent underwear.
Adults are able to come in terms with their incontinence where most kids do not. The reason kids don’t is the simple fact; they are closer to an age of toddler than an adult. Children just feel bedwetting issue reflects on them more as being a little kid/baby than an adult.
Kids who are bedwetters are quite often shamed by adults to motivate them to stop or teased by family members and friends, which make things just worse due to the fact these additional stress causes even more accidents due to the fact of an immature nervous system. So they end up having the opposite effect, which leaves them with a poorer self-esteem and confidence in themselves.
Once again, incontinence is not the important issue but how it affects a child, which can last a life time!!
Sincerely, Steven F. Trimarco
SOME POSTING IN OUR STAYDRY GROUP
Some posting in our StayDry group
Bedwetting and possible link with ADHD kids
Researchers have stated that there is a very high probability of a link between ADHD and bedwetting. These children have a problem with controlling their behavior and are seen as being ‘hyperactive’ or ‘impulsive’. This condition has been studied extensively in children and till now, a permanent cure for this condition has not been found. All they can provide meds to address the ADHD symptoms.
One thing for sure, ADHD kids need a lot of structure and consistency and easily get distracted and have a hard time finishing tasks.
Now ADHD child is difficult enough and if your child also has Nocturnal Enuresis (Bedwetting) and especially if they also have Diurnal (Daytime time wetting) issue is even more challenging. Because they have a hard time focusing and get easily distracted, which makes it difficult for a child with ADHD to manage their hygiene care successfully, and need parents support.
The following is posting in our StayDry support group through a questionnaire managing hygiene by a mother trial and tribulations dealing with 14yr old ADHD incontinent son.
(Please note I have omitted their name to protect their privacy)
Question -- How do you manage their hygiene ?
A) Do they cooperate and tell you when they need to be change ?
My son is very unfocused and easily distracted. If I have him in
daytime diapers I usually have to check him myself, but he's
cooperative when being changed.
B) Are they able to change themselves or do they need your help ?
I still change my son's diapers and also supervise dressing and
bathing him as with his ADHD he is so easily distracted it's
difficult for him to concentrate and follow through on simple tasks.
If I didn't diaper him, it would never get done.
C) What is the best method of changing a child if he/she still needs
help in changing ?
I undress him and have him lie down on a waterproof pad on his bed.
He's so used to this that he almost always raises his legs up so I'll
have an easier time diapering him. When he's more "hyper," I'll hold
up one of the diaper pins and tell him to hold still if he doesn't
want to be stuck. This usually works.
D) Does your household have daily ritual, when it comes to putting on
night protection. (For example I have some parents report that right
after dinner, or after they have finish homework etc.)
I diaper him about thirty minutes before bedtime. Once he's in
diapers, plastic pants and his pajamas or sleepers, he likes to sit
with me on the couch and watch a little TV or have me read something
to him. This has a way of calming him down and making it easier to
tuck him in at bedtime.
E) Upon waking, if the child had an accident do they take a bath in
the morning, or do you have to get after them and clean them up
before going to school ?
I remove his wet diapers and plastic pants and bathe him so it will
actually be done. Left to his own devices, he seems to try and find
a way to avoid doing something or wanders off to play in his room. I
make sure he goes to the bathroom before I take him to school.
ADHD Kids are higher maintenance, and parents need to be more diligent in managing their care because ADHD kids have more difficult time managing on their own because they often get distracted and forget about changing when they should and do not follow through with proper hygiene procedures.
Please note parenting a child you treat them maturity age appropriate and not go by physical age.
Free Service - Free letter to help your child build-self-esteem & become more responsible for their care.
The purpose of this letter is to help your child become more aware that they are not alone!! There are many other children from 6 to 18yrs old (7,500,000 in U.S.) that have the same problem, and just because they have this issue doesn’t make them some kind of baby. Now that they are older, and not a baby, there are things they can do in order to take better care of themselves and to help them build their self-esteem.
The letter we send you, which you give to your child is adjusted by age. So if you are indeed interested in this free service all, we ask if you let us know if this letter helped them or not. So we can improve on the letter if need be.
Steven F. Trimarco
P.S. Please be sure to include the child's name and age in the message area. The letters are adjusted by age from 4 to 19 years old..